The Happy Sociopath vs. The Miserable Sucker

In Ancient Rome in the year 201AD, the very forward-thinking philosopher Quintus Darius Marco determined that there are two types of people in the world: Miserable Suckers and Happy Sociopaths. Or, in his words, “aut lupus aut vacca foeda.”

Who but the Romans understood this dichotomy better?  First they rose to world domination as heartless warlords, invading, raping, toppling kingdoms, feeding the weak to the lions and enslaving the rest. Subsequently, though, they were stupid enough to allow a bunch of sensitive suckers to make their civilization more civilized.  Big mistake!  Soon they were asking the common people their opinions, thoughts and feelings.  As a result, things got messy.  Eventually, they lost it all when piteous emperor “Little Augustus” let the empire crumble around him while he wept in the lap of a royal hooker.

There is no denying the universal truth formulated by our friend Quintus. There are two types of people in the world: the Miserable Suckers and the Happy Sociopaths.  Which are you?  No offense, but you are probably of the Miserable Sucker set.


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